All you ever wanted to know about black history but were afraid to ask

I got a “Black History Month” brochure peddled on me today while I was going to Robin Barker to get my hair done. It was extremely interesting and I just have to share the contents.

First the brochure has some short biographies of prominent people like Elija McCoy. So far, so good.

Then it offers some word puzzles. Like the following:

Tornadoes, Hurricanes, Floods THE _EA_ _ER
White Mother, Black Father _A_ _K _B_ _A
(In case you could not guess, that’s “The weather” and “Barak Obama” respectively; the answer is kindly provided a few lines below)

Then the brochure has a wonderful list of INVENTIONS (I will reproduce the entire page here, without omissions or alterations):



Black Inventions

1) Traffic lights
2) Cellular phone
3) Elevator
4) Refrigerator
5) Gas Mask
6) Clothes Dryer
7) Clothes Dresser
8 ) Ice Cream
9) Guitar
10) Helicopter
11) Street Sweepers
12) Ironing board
13) Fire escape ladder
14) Printing Press
15) Toilet
16) Stair Climbing Wheelchair
17) Mop
18) Shoe
19) Alphabet
20) Chess
21) Folding Bed
22) Remote Control
23) Lantern
24) Golf Tee
25) Eye Protection
26) Lawn Sprinkler
27) Heating Furnace
28) Fire Extinguisher
29) Typewriter
30) Piano

Asian Inventions
1) Desktop Calculators 2) Collapsable Umbrella 3) Compass 4) The game of soccer 5) Toilet Paper 6) Suspension Bridge 7) VCR 8 ) Bristle Toothbrush 9) Scissors 10) Noodles

Hispanic Inventions
1) Color Television 2) Reversible Motor 3) Magnetic Brakes 4) Yo-Yo 5) Windmill 6) Rocket-belt 7) Birth Control Pills 8 ) Ochoaplane (plane with collapsable wings) 9) Improved Photograph Print Wash Method 10) Acceleglove (A glove that can translate sign language into speech)

Caucasian Inventions
1) Military Tank 2) Rifle 3) Bullet 4) Rocket 5) Nuclear Reactor 6) Telescope 7) Microscope 8 ) Microwave oven 9) Barbed wire fence 10) The game of Basketball

Native Inventions
1) Totem Pole 2) Toboggan 3) Snow Shoes 4) Kayak 5) The game of Lacrosse


After that we get a story about Willie Lynch and more biographies of prominent people: Barack Obama, Che Guevara and Patrice Lumumba, some more black history (with some Native American history thrown in for good measure) and a letter to President Bush from Louis Farrakhan.

I wonder if the drivel like the list I quoted above is the type of “black-focused agenda” they are going to teach in Toronto’s first “black-focused” schools.

On the second thought, I cannot believe people can really be such idiots. It is possible that this guy and his brochures were a part of the campaign to discredit Obama and his electorate? But then, what’s the use of doing this in CANADA?


One Response to “All you ever wanted to know about black history but were afraid to ask”

  1. Spatula Says:

    Wow! Obviously, Black Inventors beat everybody else flat. But I spotted a crucial omission: the FRO!!!

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